I don't really care that much whether people listen to me. I used to think, once upon a time as a young lady, that I'd do something grand and impressive, change the world and all that stuff. I don't care about that anymore. Now, the more I've learned, the more I've come to lean toward the conclusion that the best thing in the world is for the world to leave you alone.
There is ultimately nothing to accomplish in life. You don't need to be rich or well-liked or of prestigious social standing. You don't need much of anything to be happy. You just need to focus on being happy, because you can only do one thing at a time in life.
If you try to do more than that, nothing gets done because your intentions conflict with each other, one hand pushes against the other. You must choose. Career or family, money or love, success or happiness… you cannot have it all. You can really only have one thing in life, and you'd better choose carefully.
You can choose money, spend all your days in gradually expanding offices and finally die of a heart attack in a board meeting while your gold-plated Ferrari sits quietly in the garage of your fifty-room mansion in the most exclusive neighborhood in the state.
You can choose family, be buried in a 2-for-1 bargain plot with your spouse & children weeping over your headstone and be as forgotten as a dead squirrel in the forest in a matter of generations. I hate to think of this especially having two children of my own, but hey let's be realistic.
You can choose anything you want in life and probably get it, but you can only completely achieve one thing. If you split your priorities, you will achieve split results as well. You can have a little bit of money, a little bit of prestige, a little bit of family and a little bit of everything else, but none of them will be complete for you. If you want 100% success with anything, that thing must comprise 100% of your priorities. Each goal you set for yourself takes away from all your other goals, because circumstances will always force you to further one at the expense of another and to choose between them every day.
My advice to you is to focus on happiness, on enjoying life. You probably don't want to hear this, but this means you will not have status, be oober rich, or anything else. Conversely, focusing on money, status or anything else means you will not achieve happiness. Happiness is not success. Happiness is the opposite of conventional success.
It's not having things, it's ceasing to want things. When you stop caring about everything that could be and focus completely on enjoying what is, you are happy.
You are unhappy when you think your life isn't the way it should be, that you need to change X and Y and then your life can really begin. It doesn't work like that, though. This is your life, RIGHT NOW, THIS IS IT! Are you happy? That's the truth right there.
Because people mostly do not want happiness. They want something else, something like money or success or status or respect, a beautiful wife or a wikipedia entry that says they were important. They want other people to think they are happy more than they really want to be happy. When you want to be happy even if it means that everyone you've ever loved and everyone you're ever going to meet will think you're a pathetic loser, that's when you're ready to be happy. Not before.
Being happy is the simplest thing in the world. Just do something that completely occupies your attention.
This is why people do extreme sports – the danger requires their complete attention so there is room for nothing else in their brain, and their internal monologue about everything that they think is wrong in their life quiets down. You don't need to risk death, though. Watch a really good TV show or play a video game, something that really draws you in. Once you get better at giving your complete attention to the immediate present moment, you can do anything. Cook dinner, go for a walk in the park, sit still and do nothing. As long as you can stay out of your head and out of the range of that internal voice that nags about changes it wants made, you'll stay happy. I had a day like that yesterday & only I allowed it to ruin my happiness....silly silly silly me for allowing it. Happiness is your natural default state. Do you think lions lying in the sun berate themselves over what an ex-girlfriend or sibling said about them on Facebook?
That's the secret to happiness right there. It doesn't seem that impressive since I didn't stretch it out to 180 pages with exciting Sanskrit words and made-up spiritual-sounding terms thrown in and charge 29 bucks for it. But it is the truth.
I've said what I wanted to say on this blog and I could probably have said it a lot quicker. What does the future hold for me? I might just go and do something completely normal and boring or pointless that involves hanging out in the grave yard wondering if the day of the dead will ever be and play Zombies with my son(s) because it's funny & I know it will evolve into more happiness because it is silly & fun.
No one can know the future, and don't ever let anyone convince you they can. Those people on TV and on the internet trying to tell you what "will happen" in the next ten or twenty years are full of shit. All of them. Especially the experts.
Don't budge into the pressure of doing what does not make you happy, know thy self and what makes you soar and don't take it personal if other's don't get you, just be who you are and in the moment of happiness.
Friday, March 30, 2012
Monday, March 12, 2012
Laugh a little or better yet a lot.....
Wow, it's been a while since I've written, last year to be exact. I do plan to try and keep it a up a bit more this year even though I'm off to a late start. So for now, let me write about my favorite thing; that thing being laughing. I mean seriously, I am the cheapest date for a chuckle & a giggle.
There's no pleasure as wonderfully simple as a good laugh. A fancy meal requires extra time on the treadmill. An exotic trip abroad will drain your wallet. And while there's nothing quite as cathartic as a good cry, where's the fun in that?
Spontaneous funny moments happen all the time, yet the art of manufacturing comedy is a tricky business. Drama is like a good keylime pie: It's not easy to make it great, but the ingredients are pretty simple. Loss. Betrayal. Bad luck. It doesn't take a rocket scientist to make you feel rotten.
Comedy, on the other hand, can come at you from any direction. It's unpredictable and infectious. It requires timing & execution, plus a real understanding of how to please a diverse audience. Our individual senses of humor are defined by our struggles and our values, and no two people walk the same road. So how do you create a joke with universal appeal that also gives everyone the feeling it was just for them. The good news is that there are a lot of comedians taking the challenge. And increasingly, those comedians are us.
One way we're wresting humor from sitcom writing rooms, comedy clubs, bringing it on the streets with flash mobs, blogs (my personal most recent favorite blog my dearest friend Amber introduced me to is Crappypictures, a must go to read). These communal experiences have grown so popular that they've come full circle. We've also taken comedy online, ofcourse. Many who earn a living to make people laugh have mended a funny bone that was broken. Sites like Funnyordie.com & YouTube.com have democratized comedy by giving everyone a shot at it. Feel free to skip the multiplex offering and make it your mission to get into some real-live entertainment, whether it's an innovative comedy project or a classic festival. Heck, why not go one step further with a little laughing yoga (yes it is real-google it) or circus training?
The magic of good comedy is that it doesn't allow you to sit around passively-it demands full participation. After all, you're either laughing or you're not. And when you do, it feels really really good. So what are you waiting for and laugh some bliss into your life.
There's no pleasure as wonderfully simple as a good laugh. A fancy meal requires extra time on the treadmill. An exotic trip abroad will drain your wallet. And while there's nothing quite as cathartic as a good cry, where's the fun in that?
Spontaneous funny moments happen all the time, yet the art of manufacturing comedy is a tricky business. Drama is like a good keylime pie: It's not easy to make it great, but the ingredients are pretty simple. Loss. Betrayal. Bad luck. It doesn't take a rocket scientist to make you feel rotten.
Comedy, on the other hand, can come at you from any direction. It's unpredictable and infectious. It requires timing & execution, plus a real understanding of how to please a diverse audience. Our individual senses of humor are defined by our struggles and our values, and no two people walk the same road. So how do you create a joke with universal appeal that also gives everyone the feeling it was just for them. The good news is that there are a lot of comedians taking the challenge. And increasingly, those comedians are us.
One way we're wresting humor from sitcom writing rooms, comedy clubs, bringing it on the streets with flash mobs, blogs (my personal most recent favorite blog my dearest friend Amber introduced me to is Crappypictures, a must go to read). These communal experiences have grown so popular that they've come full circle. We've also taken comedy online, ofcourse. Many who earn a living to make people laugh have mended a funny bone that was broken. Sites like Funnyordie.com & YouTube.com have democratized comedy by giving everyone a shot at it. Feel free to skip the multiplex offering and make it your mission to get into some real-live entertainment, whether it's an innovative comedy project or a classic festival. Heck, why not go one step further with a little laughing yoga (yes it is real-google it) or circus training?
The magic of good comedy is that it doesn't allow you to sit around passively-it demands full participation. After all, you're either laughing or you're not. And when you do, it feels really really good. So what are you waiting for and laugh some bliss into your life.
Thursday, September 22, 2011
The Purity of Fall Bliss.....
I am hopelessly in love with the changing season that is fall and its exhilarating nip in the air, which sets an edge to ones’ energy. Don't get me wrong, I can find much love for the summer, spring, & winter but they do not hold a candle to my affection and grandiose feelings of aliveness felt in my heart for an autumn breeze. Inhaling the sensational allure of what is fall; the spiritual energy of air intermingling with soul creating a recharge followed by a refreshing tingle all over....how can you not react with such purity when the Autumnal Equinox sets above?
The sunshine is delicious, rain is refreshing, wind braces us up, if we are lucky enough to have it, snow is enchanting. There really is no such thing as bad weather, only different kinds of good weather in the fall. I am particularly fond of the rain this time of year. Being uniformed in my galoshes alongside my boys, taking on as many puddles as we can find, letting the rain kiss us and sing us a lullaby. Anyone who says only sunshine brings happiness has never danced in the rain. The fall weather can provide a great metaphor for life – sometimes it’s good, sometimes it’s bad, and there’s nothing much you can do about it but to carry an umbrella and if you’re lucky a rainbow will apologize for the angry skies. Some people get wet in the rain; I much more prefer to walk in it. The best kind of rain, of course, is a cozy rain. This is the kind the anonymous medevil poet makes me remember, the rain that falls on a day when you’d just as soon stay in bed a little longer, write letters or read a good book by the fire, take early tea with hot scones and jam and look out the streaked window with complacency.
The grandest feelings of fall are the “in the moment” experiences. I like to suck them ALL in, even the tiniest ones that most persons would look past. I thrive on the spooky wild and gusty; swirling dervishes of rattling leaves racing by, fleeing the wind flung deadwood that cracks & thumps behind. The substance of the winds is too thin for the human eyes, their written language is too difficult for human minds, and their spoken language mostly to faint for the ears; it’s all so poetic. I love when the sun creeps beyond a gray cloud and its rays lay like a friendly arm across your shoulder. I am ecstatic by the excitement of Halloween and the spookity feeling it has deep in my heart; the wiles of imagination, decorating with great enthusiasm with my family and delivering on child hood thrills. Picking out pumpkins at a pumkin patch is all too momentous and sets anchor to the season. The magical sound of laughter at festivals and the enjoyment of community shared with friends and love ones is squishy sweet. Snuggling up with a book, blanket, and my little love bug boys under the trees in our hammock while the birds sing us enchanting songs gives off a refreshed feeling. Adventurous hikes are a must with touching, smelling, exploring, & experiencing nature at its best. The smells of crisp leaves burning in the air defines the season’s charm. Rustling around in leaves always promises tons of laughter with my boys. On a cold evening, making use of the fire place or the fire pit outside and roasting marshmallows’ engages great conversation. I look forward to school activities, volunteering, cooking, baking seasonal treats, parties, strolls on the beach on a windy day, star gazing the chilled skies, the mountains, endeavoring my favorite restaurants that have outside seating, hayrides, football, opening windows, my husband wrapping me up in his arms because my bones shiver from the cold, traveling and oh so much more! I love being in love with every little moment. Taking notice to all the little things makes for tremendous bliss! Here's to another year love affair with all that is fall/Autumn.
MEET:
Autumn and Fall
In honor of great gifts of fall: these were our flying squirrels that literally fell upon us 4 years ago on the first day of fall on a chilly, crisp Saturday morning. We no longer have them, they are unfortunately very high maintenance and that just was not going to work out with a second baby on the way. But they sure were cute, funny, adorable, & entertaining creatures. My jack-russell terrier treated them as though they were her pups and gave them baths. They were amazing flyers too and loved just hanging in your shirt pocket for hours.
The sunshine is delicious, rain is refreshing, wind braces us up, if we are lucky enough to have it, snow is enchanting. There really is no such thing as bad weather, only different kinds of good weather in the fall. I am particularly fond of the rain this time of year. Being uniformed in my galoshes alongside my boys, taking on as many puddles as we can find, letting the rain kiss us and sing us a lullaby. Anyone who says only sunshine brings happiness has never danced in the rain. The fall weather can provide a great metaphor for life – sometimes it’s good, sometimes it’s bad, and there’s nothing much you can do about it but to carry an umbrella and if you’re lucky a rainbow will apologize for the angry skies. Some people get wet in the rain; I much more prefer to walk in it. The best kind of rain, of course, is a cozy rain. This is the kind the anonymous medevil poet makes me remember, the rain that falls on a day when you’d just as soon stay in bed a little longer, write letters or read a good book by the fire, take early tea with hot scones and jam and look out the streaked window with complacency.
The grandest feelings of fall are the “in the moment” experiences. I like to suck them ALL in, even the tiniest ones that most persons would look past. I thrive on the spooky wild and gusty; swirling dervishes of rattling leaves racing by, fleeing the wind flung deadwood that cracks & thumps behind. The substance of the winds is too thin for the human eyes, their written language is too difficult for human minds, and their spoken language mostly to faint for the ears; it’s all so poetic. I love when the sun creeps beyond a gray cloud and its rays lay like a friendly arm across your shoulder. I am ecstatic by the excitement of Halloween and the spookity feeling it has deep in my heart; the wiles of imagination, decorating with great enthusiasm with my family and delivering on child hood thrills. Picking out pumpkins at a pumkin patch is all too momentous and sets anchor to the season. The magical sound of laughter at festivals and the enjoyment of community shared with friends and love ones is squishy sweet. Snuggling up with a book, blanket, and my little love bug boys under the trees in our hammock while the birds sing us enchanting songs gives off a refreshed feeling. Adventurous hikes are a must with touching, smelling, exploring, & experiencing nature at its best. The smells of crisp leaves burning in the air defines the season’s charm. Rustling around in leaves always promises tons of laughter with my boys. On a cold evening, making use of the fire place or the fire pit outside and roasting marshmallows’ engages great conversation. I look forward to school activities, volunteering, cooking, baking seasonal treats, parties, strolls on the beach on a windy day, star gazing the chilled skies, the mountains, endeavoring my favorite restaurants that have outside seating, hayrides, football, opening windows, my husband wrapping me up in his arms because my bones shiver from the cold, traveling and oh so much more! I love being in love with every little moment. Taking notice to all the little things makes for tremendous bliss! Here's to another year love affair with all that is fall/Autumn.
MEET:
Autumn and Fall
Tuesday, September 6, 2011
Creating Perfect Packaging can equal Irresistible Bliss........
Have you ever had the feeling you were meant for great things? As a little girl, did you know you had something special to express into the world? Many of us have lost touch with our whimsical, feminine dreams of greatness in exchange for a more driven, masculine take on success. Without even knowing it, we've been enlisted on a mission: to prove we can do it as well as or better than, the men. We are all so desperate to attain what we imagine will make us equal and happy (a successful career, marriage, family, 2.2 kids) that we forget who we really are: brilliant, sexy and magical beings like no other.
We've forgotten that our power lies not in competing with or trying to be like men but in embracing our natural and womanly strengths of compassion, enchantment, and tenderness. We are intuitive healers and masterful lovers. Our hearts run deep with emotions, and we cast a wide net of spiritual truth. Our sexuality and feminine wiles inspire, enliven, and empower. We as woman are remarkable.
The world is in desperate need of irresistible woman; woman who are willing to be enthusiastic, alive, and expressive-regardless of the circumstances; woman who are not afraid to tell their truth or speak up for what they believe in; woman who feel at ease being intelligent, sensual, and compassionate all at once; woman who do not compete with, demean, or do battle against men (or other woman) but who see everyone for who they really are - fellow human beings also in search of a great life in search of love & bliss.
A woman must claim & show her irresistibility to the world as key to fulfilling her potential as a woman and a human being. It's the secret to making an impact on the world you were meant to make. Woman who embrace their irresistibility hold the heart to the world. Be sure to embrace your feminine as well as your masculine energies. We all have both and integrating them in a balanced way is the key to unlocking your full potential as a human being and your bliss.
A huge part in being your irresistible self in a perfect package, delicious, scrumptious, take me home now gorgeous gal kind of way takes pride and respect in one’s self and I'll give you great examples of how to achieve that. The real sin against life is to abuse and destroy beauty, even one's own- even more one's own, for that has been put in our care and we are responsible for its well-being. Perfect packaging is the art of making your outer appearance a natural and irresistible extension of your inner fox.
Now Irresistibility Action Tips:
*Do not wear clothes that actually do not make you feel attractive & just pray that someone will notice your inner goddess underneath the layers of T-shirts, baggy sweaters, and sweatpants? Go through your closet & get rid of old, unattractive, and unflattering items.
*Update your cosmetics and have fun with your make up.
*Love thy hair! Invest in a great style and lavish your hair with the best products; be good to your hair it's one of your best accessories.
*Take care of your skin! Do body scrubs, enlighten yourself with an oil bath and always be sure to moisturize. A woman should be soft just as she is elegant.
*Make sure to take care of your teeth, a bright smile can brighten everyone’s day, get professional support in this department if need be. I must give an honorable mention to one of my dearest friends Trig in this department because she does it "oh so well" with her amazing bright smile, it will truly make your day and lighten up a room!
*How about your figure? Do you maintain a strong & fit body or do you hide your babe-ness behind a layer of unhealthy extra weight? Create a consistent exercise routine. Not too skinny though, curves is where it's at!
*Update bras & underwear, cosmetics & skin care & hair products, jewelry and accessories, shoes, work clothes, evening clothes, workout clothes, socks. Newness is always great!
*Do you know your body type? How clear are you on what you should or should not be wearing? Become aware if you are not already.
Irresistible woman pay attention to the details. Become practiced in treating yourself like a beautiful diamond that sparkles with a little polishing. Commit to having everything you own be in great shape- especially you. In life, everything matters. It's not different with your appearance. Healthy skin is just as important as healthy hair. Great shoes are just as important as great clothes. Nice bras are as important as nice socks. Investigate your wardrobe, your cosmetic bag, and your jewelry box. Look for rips, stains, or wear & tear and get rid of anything that doesn’t make you feel your best.
Simply become aware of details and commit to keeping your appearance clean & crisp. I'm not suggesting you take on an obsessive-compulsive striving for perfection, but do experience the personal ease and satisfaction that comes with having things around you being well taken care of.
And finally and most importantly, don't rush as you get ready for your day. Apply makeup carefully. Allow enough time to wash & style your hair so you look and feel fresh. Do what you know will support your irresistibility inside & out. Drink water, take vitamins, and wear sunscreen. Nourish yourself with healthy, nutrient-rich food that fuels you. And never underestimate the impact that consistent exercise has on your irresistibility, with all the benefits exercise offers, the payoff is well worth the investment. "Investment" being a key word.....Invest in you and be irresistibly blissful along the way.
We've forgotten that our power lies not in competing with or trying to be like men but in embracing our natural and womanly strengths of compassion, enchantment, and tenderness. We are intuitive healers and masterful lovers. Our hearts run deep with emotions, and we cast a wide net of spiritual truth. Our sexuality and feminine wiles inspire, enliven, and empower. We as woman are remarkable.
The world is in desperate need of irresistible woman; woman who are willing to be enthusiastic, alive, and expressive-regardless of the circumstances; woman who are not afraid to tell their truth or speak up for what they believe in; woman who feel at ease being intelligent, sensual, and compassionate all at once; woman who do not compete with, demean, or do battle against men (or other woman) but who see everyone for who they really are - fellow human beings also in search of a great life in search of love & bliss.
A woman must claim & show her irresistibility to the world as key to fulfilling her potential as a woman and a human being. It's the secret to making an impact on the world you were meant to make. Woman who embrace their irresistibility hold the heart to the world. Be sure to embrace your feminine as well as your masculine energies. We all have both and integrating them in a balanced way is the key to unlocking your full potential as a human being and your bliss.
A huge part in being your irresistible self in a perfect package, delicious, scrumptious, take me home now gorgeous gal kind of way takes pride and respect in one’s self and I'll give you great examples of how to achieve that. The real sin against life is to abuse and destroy beauty, even one's own- even more one's own, for that has been put in our care and we are responsible for its well-being. Perfect packaging is the art of making your outer appearance a natural and irresistible extension of your inner fox.
Now Irresistibility Action Tips:
*Do not wear clothes that actually do not make you feel attractive & just pray that someone will notice your inner goddess underneath the layers of T-shirts, baggy sweaters, and sweatpants? Go through your closet & get rid of old, unattractive, and unflattering items.
*Update your cosmetics and have fun with your make up.
*Love thy hair! Invest in a great style and lavish your hair with the best products; be good to your hair it's one of your best accessories.
*Take care of your skin! Do body scrubs, enlighten yourself with an oil bath and always be sure to moisturize. A woman should be soft just as she is elegant.
*Make sure to take care of your teeth, a bright smile can brighten everyone’s day, get professional support in this department if need be. I must give an honorable mention to one of my dearest friends Trig in this department because she does it "oh so well" with her amazing bright smile, it will truly make your day and lighten up a room!
*How about your figure? Do you maintain a strong & fit body or do you hide your babe-ness behind a layer of unhealthy extra weight? Create a consistent exercise routine. Not too skinny though, curves is where it's at!
*Update bras & underwear, cosmetics & skin care & hair products, jewelry and accessories, shoes, work clothes, evening clothes, workout clothes, socks. Newness is always great!
*Do you know your body type? How clear are you on what you should or should not be wearing? Become aware if you are not already.
Irresistible woman pay attention to the details. Become practiced in treating yourself like a beautiful diamond that sparkles with a little polishing. Commit to having everything you own be in great shape- especially you. In life, everything matters. It's not different with your appearance. Healthy skin is just as important as healthy hair. Great shoes are just as important as great clothes. Nice bras are as important as nice socks. Investigate your wardrobe, your cosmetic bag, and your jewelry box. Look for rips, stains, or wear & tear and get rid of anything that doesn’t make you feel your best.
Simply become aware of details and commit to keeping your appearance clean & crisp. I'm not suggesting you take on an obsessive-compulsive striving for perfection, but do experience the personal ease and satisfaction that comes with having things around you being well taken care of.
And finally and most importantly, don't rush as you get ready for your day. Apply makeup carefully. Allow enough time to wash & style your hair so you look and feel fresh. Do what you know will support your irresistibility inside & out. Drink water, take vitamins, and wear sunscreen. Nourish yourself with healthy, nutrient-rich food that fuels you. And never underestimate the impact that consistent exercise has on your irresistibility, with all the benefits exercise offers, the payoff is well worth the investment. "Investment" being a key word.....Invest in you and be irresistibly blissful along the way.
Sunday, August 28, 2011
Thank you to my husband......
I feel so very fortunate in having such an incredible loving-supportive husband that I am going to dedicate this post by thanking him for being just that. Together my husband and I dance to the beat of our own tune. We live a beautiful life filled with love, laughter, adoration, and tremendous respect & support of one another and cherish it without a care in the world of how silly we may come off to others. You look in the dictionary and our relationship defines “Awesomeness.” Ok, I am being a bit silly but to us we really do think highly of our relationship and we should because we have worked for this great foundation we have provided with one another.
Now to my lover: I thank you for always embracing me for all of my odd quirks’, my moodiness and always making light of it, constantly teaching me new things, truly fulfilling your role as husband and father going way beyond any expectations I ever had, being a true romantic, always flashing a smile at me to follow with a hug, kiss, and butt grab every morning when we first wake up, for being affectionate all day every day, for treating me like a lady, being protective of me, for tons & tons of laughter, finding my bossiness cute(I'm just going to think of it as being a leader type personality though) being the best snuggler, being my strength when I am weak, being my eyes when I can’t see, for still dating me-loving it and still calling me your girlfriend, holding my hand, for always desiring me, always being on my side at functions, for being my lover, husband, & best-friend, completing my thoughts, for being my knight in shining armor & always rescuing me, being a great communicator, dancing with me without a care in the world at home & in public, for being an honest Godly man and for enjoying going to church as a family every Sunday, sitting down every evening at the dinner table as a family, for Friday night family date nights, showing by example of being kind & respectful to our boys, always putting us-your family first no matter what and everyone knows this and where you stand- no question end of story, looking into my eyes so passionately, placing value on our love; our beautiful boys and not items/things-our love represents our riches, having great values and truly portraying them, for always messaging me and rubbing my feet,for helping out around the house without me having to ask, for always being on time, indulging me in my cravings in a minutes notice, letting me fall into your arms and just cry, cry, cry when needed and feeling so safe there, for embracing, respecting, and loving me as the strong feminine unique woman that I am, for always catching me when I fall (literally & figuratively), playing guitar for me and singing to me, watching chick flicks with me, for working so hard so that I can be home and present in every moment in our boys lives, for supporting all of my free time without ever making me feel guilty for it, and finally most importantly, for being fully devoted and committed to us. Thank you for showing & proving that real men do exist in this world, no excuses about it.
Every woman needs to be strong and still be soft on the outside. As a woman understanding exactly how to mix your femininity with DIGNITY, how to mix being a Strong Woman with your feminine warmth – I am so grateful to my husband for being supportive in my being this kind of woman and by that he continues to blow me away with the most exquisite, thrilling, happy, easy, fun and most eternally committed and fulfilling blissful relationship. I love you my sweet, sweet, handsome lover.
Friday, August 19, 2011
Up your self Esteem By Being The Siren You Already Are Within…..
I've been hearing a lot from woman as of lately whom are not feeling too confident in their relationships, so maybe I can provide a bit of vice in hopes that it can help some ladies out, so here we go. Are you finding yourself working so hard to get a relationship and or keep it going? Depending On Him To Feel Good Always Backfires. When you are sensitive and insecure around men and are constantly monitoring what you say or do around them. Men can actually feel this tension. It’s like a puppy - watching for hand signals from his master so you know what to do. Yuk, unattractive, after all you should be roaring like the sexy lioness you are! The good feelings you may be so desperate to have from a man aren’t possible if you’re not feeling good about yourself to begin with. Let me save you a lot of time and pain by sharing a powerful Relationship Tool: " I Am All That"
Imagine that your attractiveness is boundless, your eyes are magnets, your heart is an open pool of gold that man wants to dive into, and your body (no matter what you think) is a lush place that man longs for, feels awestruck just thinking about getting close to, and yet feels safe within (this goes for woman married, single, & dating). If you are not already a confident woman with self awareness and knows this is already what your man see's, then really try and feel that's what he sees, thinks and feels. “He’ll want to know what it is that makes you feel so confident, and he’ll want to get in on your “I'm all that!” When any doubts, fears, and negative thoughts come up, simply tell them to step aside. Paint this picture of boundless attractiveness for yourself right now, this moment, and keep it going all day and night, no matter what happens. Once this picture is in your mind, and the good feelings it brings are in your heart and body, you'll notice something amazing happening. When you're in the market, at the drugstore, walking down the street, and waiting in line at the coffee house - you will begin to experience yourself as a magnet for men. Once you start practicing this Tool - and I mean make it a habit every day - you'll find that your love life takes a huge leap in the right direction. Why? Because you have created the very feelings within you that you have so desperately tried to get from a man. And that is very empowering - not to mention extremely attractive. Practicing this Tool, and mastering it, is the first step to feeling so good and so at ease within yourself that your man will literally be running to be by your side. He’ll want to know what it is that makes you feel so confident, and want to get in on your "I'm all that!”
This doesn't mean that you pretend you don't like a man - not at all. On the contrary, a man needs to know you like him, but - and here's the clincher - he needs to know that you value your own life. Putting a man's needs ahead of your own and taking a backseat to what you want is not the key to a man's heart. If you do this you will learn that not making yourself, and your life, your number one priority is actually getting in the way of the romance you so desperately want. If a man gets the feeling you're making him more important than you, he loses interest.
Be a woman who has a lot of interesting things going on all the time and your man will just want to naturally be around you. I assure you, your man will always lavish you with attention and affection. And the best part you don't have to manipulate or “pretend” to be something other than your genuine, feminine self to inspire this kind of love from a man.
I know this goes against everything we women have been taught, but it's true. Men don't fall in love with us because of how much we do for them. They fall head over heels because of how they feel when we allow them to be useful to us and do for us. They fall in love when they have to invest in us and work for our love.
In the classical Greek myths and in stories and legends that live on today in art, music and movies - the Sirens are creatures - half woman and half animal who live on a beautiful, flower-filled island off the coast of what’s now Italy. The Sirens play and sing on the island, and the beauty of their voices is mesmerizing to anyone who hears. And of course, the only ones who hear are the men sailing past the Siren’s island. In the myth, the men are so enraptured by the Siren’s song that they jump off their boats, swim for the island, let their boats crash on the rocks, and climb up to be with the Sirens. What the stories say to us now, if we read them and listen to them, is that a woman has a pull on a man - a “hold” over him - so strong that he would risk everything - his life - to be with her. What we can hear in the stories is that ALL women have this power. All women have a Siren Song. All women have the power to hypnotically attract a man. You are NOT the exception! Being a Siren is your birthright as a woman, and we have all been taught to ignore our Siren within.
All you need to do is understand that power you have, believe in it, and know HOW to USE it. ANY woman can become a Siren! You just need to know how to tap into that Siren Power and share it with a man so he can be “caught by your song” and “drawn to your island…” There is a real way to attract men like a magnet - even the man you’re with right now who seems fatally disinterested and cold - WITHOUT worrying about all the things we women have been TAUGHT to worry about, and using the strengths and qualities you ALREADY HAVE.
Know your special love within before focusing on him. Look out a window and imagine what it is that you love (aside from him). Imagine the love in your heart - all that energy and sweetness and passion - going out the window to that thing you love. This might be painting, or the beach, or giving to those less fortunate, or helping people in your special, unique way. Really contemplate what it is that you love about this thing, how it has enriched your life, and what it is that makes it special to you. Notice how it makes you feel centered and with a sense of purpose. Suddenly, you'll realize that there's a lot more to your life than this one man, and you will feel your personal power flooding back to you. Instantly re-shifting your focus like this works like magic. This creates resilience of self- power that attracts a man’s heart to your heart. The truth is once you really discover who you are & love yourself, you’ll know on your own why “I am all that” without having to remind your self and that is sexy!
What makes a man fall in love? A man falls in love with you because he knows he can be himself around you. He falls in love with you because he feels SAFE expressing his innermost, private feelings with you. He feels this way because he knows that you can handle your feelings. He can sense that. And because he senses that at the most unconscious level, he starts to long for your company, for your touch, for your affection. He may not even know why he feels this way. All he knows is that there's something special about you that he doesn't feel with any other woman in his life. He's in love with YOU and that is BLISS!
Imagine that your attractiveness is boundless, your eyes are magnets, your heart is an open pool of gold that man wants to dive into, and your body (no matter what you think) is a lush place that man longs for, feels awestruck just thinking about getting close to, and yet feels safe within (this goes for woman married, single, & dating). If you are not already a confident woman with self awareness and knows this is already what your man see's, then really try and feel that's what he sees, thinks and feels. “He’ll want to know what it is that makes you feel so confident, and he’ll want to get in on your “I'm all that!” When any doubts, fears, and negative thoughts come up, simply tell them to step aside. Paint this picture of boundless attractiveness for yourself right now, this moment, and keep it going all day and night, no matter what happens. Once this picture is in your mind, and the good feelings it brings are in your heart and body, you'll notice something amazing happening. When you're in the market, at the drugstore, walking down the street, and waiting in line at the coffee house - you will begin to experience yourself as a magnet for men. Once you start practicing this Tool - and I mean make it a habit every day - you'll find that your love life takes a huge leap in the right direction. Why? Because you have created the very feelings within you that you have so desperately tried to get from a man. And that is very empowering - not to mention extremely attractive. Practicing this Tool, and mastering it, is the first step to feeling so good and so at ease within yourself that your man will literally be running to be by your side. He’ll want to know what it is that makes you feel so confident, and want to get in on your "I'm all that!”
This doesn't mean that you pretend you don't like a man - not at all. On the contrary, a man needs to know you like him, but - and here's the clincher - he needs to know that you value your own life. Putting a man's needs ahead of your own and taking a backseat to what you want is not the key to a man's heart. If you do this you will learn that not making yourself, and your life, your number one priority is actually getting in the way of the romance you so desperately want. If a man gets the feeling you're making him more important than you, he loses interest.
Be a woman who has a lot of interesting things going on all the time and your man will just want to naturally be around you. I assure you, your man will always lavish you with attention and affection. And the best part you don't have to manipulate or “pretend” to be something other than your genuine, feminine self to inspire this kind of love from a man.
I know this goes against everything we women have been taught, but it's true. Men don't fall in love with us because of how much we do for them. They fall head over heels because of how they feel when we allow them to be useful to us and do for us. They fall in love when they have to invest in us and work for our love.
In the classical Greek myths and in stories and legends that live on today in art, music and movies - the Sirens are creatures - half woman and half animal who live on a beautiful, flower-filled island off the coast of what’s now Italy. The Sirens play and sing on the island, and the beauty of their voices is mesmerizing to anyone who hears. And of course, the only ones who hear are the men sailing past the Siren’s island. In the myth, the men are so enraptured by the Siren’s song that they jump off their boats, swim for the island, let their boats crash on the rocks, and climb up to be with the Sirens. What the stories say to us now, if we read them and listen to them, is that a woman has a pull on a man - a “hold” over him - so strong that he would risk everything - his life - to be with her. What we can hear in the stories is that ALL women have this power. All women have a Siren Song. All women have the power to hypnotically attract a man. You are NOT the exception! Being a Siren is your birthright as a woman, and we have all been taught to ignore our Siren within.
All you need to do is understand that power you have, believe in it, and know HOW to USE it. ANY woman can become a Siren! You just need to know how to tap into that Siren Power and share it with a man so he can be “caught by your song” and “drawn to your island…” There is a real way to attract men like a magnet - even the man you’re with right now who seems fatally disinterested and cold - WITHOUT worrying about all the things we women have been TAUGHT to worry about, and using the strengths and qualities you ALREADY HAVE.
Know your special love within before focusing on him. Look out a window and imagine what it is that you love (aside from him). Imagine the love in your heart - all that energy and sweetness and passion - going out the window to that thing you love. This might be painting, or the beach, or giving to those less fortunate, or helping people in your special, unique way. Really contemplate what it is that you love about this thing, how it has enriched your life, and what it is that makes it special to you. Notice how it makes you feel centered and with a sense of purpose. Suddenly, you'll realize that there's a lot more to your life than this one man, and you will feel your personal power flooding back to you. Instantly re-shifting your focus like this works like magic. This creates resilience of self- power that attracts a man’s heart to your heart. The truth is once you really discover who you are & love yourself, you’ll know on your own why “I am all that” without having to remind your self and that is sexy!
What makes a man fall in love? A man falls in love with you because he knows he can be himself around you. He falls in love with you because he feels SAFE expressing his innermost, private feelings with you. He feels this way because he knows that you can handle your feelings. He can sense that. And because he senses that at the most unconscious level, he starts to long for your company, for your touch, for your affection. He may not even know why he feels this way. All he knows is that there's something special about you that he doesn't feel with any other woman in his life. He's in love with YOU and that is BLISS!
Monday, July 25, 2011
Don't forget to date your lover......
I often hear about couples that they just don’t have time to spend with each other. Whether the problem is children screaming, dinner to cook, clothes to wash, work, other obligations, the list goes on and on. As parents you know it can be difficult to have alone time with your spouse. So the underlined question is, where do you find the time to keep the sparks flying in your marriage and why wouldn't you make it just as much a priority as your mothering or being noticed in your profession? Mothers may find it difficult to take care of the household, work and still have time to nurture their relationship with their spouse. Do you have a calendar filled with events but no mention of time with your hubby? If so, shame on you both and correct that now! After working all day, driving kids to their various activities and making sure the household chores are done; you may not feel like getting cozy with your husband. However, it is important that you set aside time for each other. After a long day, I can’t wait to just be with my best buddy and above all getting that extra special attention that I can only get from him and wouldn’t have it any other way, after all that’s why I married him.
Romance, fire, electricity is vital to a relationship, to not have that, you are setting your relationship up for failure in the future. Everyone has close friendships, great bonds, a best friend or two. But, no one should ever top the best friend such as the person you chose to spend the rest of your life with, the best friend who you’ve chosen to also give you sheer pleasure & the intimate desire, personal affection a friend cannot give you. If you are not nurturing this, then you are guaranteed heart ache at some point. It is human nature, to have a need of desire/fireworks. This applies only to folks who truly married the love of their life and not folks who married only just to settle. If you settled then you most likely cannot comprehend the feeling of electric love....if you actually know it then you would not have settled.
I am not saying to just have sex. I am saying you need to date, have sweet intimate dinners, overnight dates, work lunches during the day, sweet phone calls with a voice that say’s “I love you”… not always a text, sweet & sexy notes left to be found by your lover, buy sweet little gifts without any reasoning, openly be affectionate to one another…actually put thought into your love affair with your spouse. I can go on & on about how to adorn your lover. I assure you, if you take care of him he will take care of you. Keep in mind that it is the little things that keep the romance alive. Instead of dropping hints to him on how you feel, just be blunt! Men find no attraction in a woman who is not assertive in her needs. In fact, "they find it sexy in you knowing what you want." Men really are simple creatures, sometimes they just need direction. However, I’ve also known of men/spouses that really just don’t get it, my opinion of that is and you have heard it said by a popular book, “he’s just not into you,” if he’s not making any effort…plain & simple. If it gets to this point you may have deeper set issues and most likely have not had true romance in a long time. Let me stress, men and woman alike NEED romance.
Doing little things for your spouse will bring back the spark and hopefully your spouse will recognize what you are doing and begin returning the favor. If you chose not to wait & see just be open & discuss what you are going to do and tell him to hop on board alongside you.
It’s called communication and if you are not able to communicate on an intimate level, I’d imagine the rest of your communications can’t be all that good. I bet there’s a lot of vague temperament, eye rolling, huffing & puffing, & being short spoken... going on. Remember that communication is the key to any successful marriage. If you and your spouse are not communicating then you can’t expect your relationship to be satisfying. The more you ignore the need to talk with your spouse, the more frustrated you may become and this tends to break any relationship down.
Finding the time to spend with each other is important because if you and your spouse are having problems, this in turn will cause problems within the family as children pick up on the tension between you both. This is all the more reason to keep the marriage in good working condition, which does require work from both partners. One solution may be to tackle household projects together with your spouse. Working as a team will allow you to accomplish more and thus free up more quality time to spend together. A real man will do anything, yes even help around the house if he truly loves you, just to have more time with you. Some men may need a clearer picture and not all men can be mind readers, they just need you to be more verbal.
So make that dinner reservation with a sexy atmosphere (no chain restaurants people, treat yourselves), add romance, get a babysitter and enjoy the time together as a couple ALONE and you will be engaged in your blissful relationship together!
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